Back to Normal

Well people, life has returned to its normal flow.  My sister came to visit me, with her little one Molly.  My very tiny niece who is perfectly adorable.  She is Molly.  It was all a perfectly wonderful thing.  there was some stress because of things going on, and mom and her weren't always on the greatest of terms but I was more than happy to see her and more so to get to do things with her that mean something to me.  To share my life with her despite the congestion of it all.  They are home now, and I already miss them.  However, its time that my life went back on track from all the chaos that had been spinning around me and turned it into something good.

I know I talk like this sometimes, but its just me I guess.

There's been some trouble on the the Mik front.  After spending the week together it seemed to be an issue that popped up at least three times after we had laid down for the night.  His elbow is hurting in the tendon, and his bicep is tensed unconsciously.  I'm not sure if its from the medications he started, or the ones that he stopped.  But I suppose that its time research was done and a proper conversation was had with one of his doctors or all of them.  I was talking to him about starting PT but I'm not certain on how to take the next step.  Stupid complications.  I wish my head worked on a better level than others, I'm not certain all the time that I function properly with all the given information, but its alright.  Good news though on the Mikki front.  It seems mom and him are getting along so much better than they use to, and she even was complimenting him the other night because of what a good man he is.  I'm so glad that she sees that, and understands why I love him so much. I can't wait until we are one family.

And after the chaos of life and the ridiculousness that has been here for the last few months, I have finally cleared my head.  I start work again on Wednesday.  Watching the kids 5 days a week from 7:15 to 5, and thankfully it should last a while.  I'm still looking for other jobs, ones that might pay a little better , but this will get my groceries paid and bills paid.  The things that matter.  And now that all this has returned to normal I have finally sat back and thought to myself, what the HELL was I doing with myself these last few weeks?  I'm a woman!  I should get myself back into the real world where I belong.

SO! I'm going back to school.  I applied for a renewed FAFSA pin tonight and as of Wednesday I will be able to fill out the financial aid papers because of it.  If I get it or not, I'm still going back.  One class at a time or not.  I'm not going for a degree, I'm just not ready for that step.  But I'm going back for a certificate.  PC technician.  I'm good at it, I enjoy it, so why not have the training to get a job doing it?  If it works out I'll continue doing it, but I'm just ready to rejoin those who work for a living.

With work and school underway I'm thinking that everything should fall together with my lifestyle as well. I have been working on getting back on track with my health, and perhaps this is the way to do it. Mental health before physical health.  Horse before the cart.

I pick up Mikki Tuesday and I can't wait to see him again.  Life spins differently when he is here.  I'm ready for you life, WE are ready for you.

Life in Limbo

Can I say pleased? It seems every time Mik is here, my life becomes something that much better.  To know him can make a person better, but to love him and have him in my life every day?  It is something that has made my life something I could never have imagined.  In high school one would never have expected it would be me to find that person that life slowed down for.  I spent years saying no, and years saying, I won't be with anyone.  But doesn't every little girl who thinks she'll never find someone claim she doesn't really want to? That is until they've laid eyes on that person. Everything is getting better day by day.

I tried on my first wedding gown on Wednesday last week.  It was sadly not able to fit though, even if we were to tailor it.  My mom has been spending time with me a lot lately talking about it and she has decided to start learning to play my precision song on violin to play with the quartet she said she was going to get.  I'm not sure how this will all work out, but I trust her when she says she will take care of that.  Music on that note, has been enjoyable.  We've been talking, Mik and I, about music, and to avoid hearing or passing by music, we've been talking about using only 1920's to 1950's music.  I love it frankly, but I'm not sure, I think for Mik's sake we are going to use a combination, he's so much better with music than me anyway.

And then with all of that going on! My sister is finally coming home! Home for a whole week! We are picking her up from the airport this Friday and I just can't wait to see her and little Molly.  According to her, her and Jes are getting married in December and she wants to go over things with me and Mikki because we have been working on things longer than her and understand the merry-go-round, though I think I'm more scatter brained on the subject really.  How can I pretend to know anything about it all?  Anyway, my sister being here makes up for it all.  I'm excited to see her, to say the least.

So why the life in limbo? Well I lost my job.  We all knew it was coming, but it actually happened.  I have been applying non-stop since then, but its alright.  We'll figure it out I hope.  I have applied at new child care positions, and at places that are season, mostly full time people, that I have received nice polite, sorry we aren't looking anymore, calls.  I will figure it out eventually. Work is hard to find, but I'm persistent.  Hopefully this is all figured out by next month and I'm back to a normal schedule.  Until then its the same schedule, pick up Emma from school, soccer, and then search for work.  Lets just figure things out.  Its okay though, I'm optimistic on the topic right now.

Yep so right now? Me? I'm in a great mood, but that of course is because Mik just spent a week here, I'm sure in a few days I'll be my grumpy self again, but it seems for now that its a good thing.  Anger never got anyone anywhere.  Safe enough to say I haven't got my picture a day done for some time, my camera has been acting funny for the last week ever since my last soccer game so no updates there, but I took a few with someone else's camera during soccer, and reminded my why I so want an SLR no matter what.  Wants however are nothing compared to needs, and its time to go check the paper!

Thank you all!

-Tine